Mothers Day. My mother’s name is Heyda Lucia Torres. At one time she was Heyda Lucia Hubble and then (I think) Heyda Lucia Torres de Vazquez. She was born in 1940. She would be horrified that I put that out there as if anyone looking at her wouldn’t get that she’s going to be 71 years old this year. How she got there mystifies me, and her doctors. She likes to say that it’s because she follows her doctor’s orders. That if he told her to eat a daily turd wrapped in seaweed that’s precisely what she’d do. I know, the imagery is pretty bad, but I’m trying to paint an accurate picture here.

Heyda is a dancer. She doesn’t dance much since she suffered a massive stroke in 1978 at the young age of 37. The stroke left her with a pronounced limp and limited use of her left hand, which she refers to as her “claw”. But she remains a dancer in her heart and soul. In her youth she danced briefly on television as part of a troupe of dancers on a variety show. My stern grandmother only allowed her to do this if she attended Beautician College after the season was over. She did, but she never worked as a beautician. Here is one of the most valuable lessons I learned from my mother although she did not teach it to me directly. Never give up on your dreams, regardless of how ridiculous they may seem to others. Your dreams are God’s gifts. This is a biblical principle by the way. How much more insane can a dream get than Abraham and Sarah’s dream of having children in their 90’s?

I believe my mother always regretted not becoming a dancer. It is probably her only major regret, but may have been the catalyst for how she has lived since. Instead, at the tender age of 18, she married a young Army specialist who was stationed in Puerto Rico at the time. His name was Garry Lee Hubble. They proceeded to have four children in their almost 12 years together. I’m the second one.

Through the course of her life my mother lived what most women dream of and also dread. She travelled extensively in her youth as an Army wife and lived with an alcoholic during that time. She raised her children with a permissiveness she wished she had as a child and didn’t have (apparently her sister and her were referred to as the “nuns of Condado”). She is a rebel at heart. She decided after two marriages that she would no longer take any crap from any man, which loosely translates into she would not be accountable to any relationship convention.

Ironically, she complains of being alone. I don’t think she’s putting the pieces together. I remember once after arguing with my wife, my mother, who was visiting, proceeded to give me “relationship advice”. It occurred to me that my relationship with my wife at the time was longer than any my mother had ever had. In fact, I had at that time lived with my wife longer than I had lived with my mother. When I pointed out the irony of her offering me that advice she replied that just because she didn’t know how to make a relationship last didn’t mean she didn’t know how to advise one on how to do so. Then she pointed out how stubborn I was being. It still cracks me up.

As a mother she is as fallible and imperfectly human as can be. My siblings are less forgiving, but I have come to terms with her. Just as my father she is almost completely self-absorbed. What she defined as “giving her children freedom” I translate as her not wanting to put in the hard work that a supervising parent must do to guide their young children through the travails of youth. We pretty much raised ourselves; left to our own devices as it were. It still surprises me that we survived our own creativity. How we all wound up productive members of society probably has as much to do with nature as with nurturing.

The greatest thing I can say about her parenting skills was this. In all my developing years I never once heard her say a negative thing about me. Not one. Even when I screwed up it was all about the behavior and not me personally. In her mind’s eye we were the princes and princess of Puerto Rico.  We were the funniest, handsomest, prettiest, smartest of all. My sister took some criticism in her teens, but even then it was the result of my mother knowing that being a woman on the island was tough and you had to be tough to survive it. You just cannot underestimate the powerful impact of this kind of positive reinforcement. If you’re not careful you could wind up a little narcissistic (of course marriage will beat that out of you in due time). In the end, this self image is critical.  

This self image is also the way she carries herself. She sees herself through a different prism than the rest of us. My mother was breathtakingly beautiful in her youth. She had classic latina features and a very buxom build when that was still fashionable. Based on her wardrobe, I believe she still thinks she has that same body. Based on her behavior I believe she still thinks she is that age. Near as I can tell she has been reliving her youth for the past 32 years. This could very well be the secret to her longevity. Most women can do with a little dose of her self image.

I love my mother unconditionally as well, even though she annoys me to no end. To her friends and most people who meet her she is the Pied Piper. She has an incredible knack for making others feel pretty darned good about themselves and she leaves an indelible mark on them. I’ve never met a person who after meeting her has anything but glowing remarks about her. She has completely captivated the Sunday School class she attends every time she visits me. In fact, I believe the only people she annoys other than me are my siblings, and the men in her brief relationships.  

A few years back I invited her to move in with me as she is on a very tight budget with her fixed SSI income and a monthly stipend from me. Also, and this is my opinion, she’s probably well past the point where she can take care of herself properly. Her response to this invitation was “I’m not dead yet”. I try not to overanalyze the fact that my mother equates moving in with me with death. I am clear that she believes I’m somewhat of a party pooper.

She has informed us that if it gets to the point where she can no longer take care of herself that we are to put her in one of those “Homes”. Of course in her mind that time is ten to twenty years off. I suspect that a decision will have to be made sooner than later. I will say this, whatever home she lands in will be forever changed by Hurricane Heyda. Whether for the good or bad would be a matter of opinion, but I’m clear the menfolk of that facility will be walking taller, dressing better and combing their sparse hairs more often. She still seems to have that effect on men. I myself am not looking forward to that day. It’s very possible that I wish I could see her through her own eyes.

Happy Mothers Day Mami. Que Dios te bendiga siempre.  

Blake Edward, dead at 88. May he rest in peace. I don’t know what his politics were, but I’m pretty sure I can state fairly accurately that he was probably another Hollywood leftist. Not that it matters to me since his movies never beat you over the head with his politics. At least not the ones I was a fan of, and there were many. Obviously the Pink Panther movies top that list. Not just for the physical comedy and brilliant delivery of Peter Sellers, but for dialogue like this:

Clouseau: Does your dog bite?

Hotel Clerk: No.

Clouseau: [bowing down to pet the dog] Nice doggie.

[Dog barks and bites Clouseau in the hand]

Clouseau: I thought you said your dog did not bite!

Hotel Clerk: That is not my dog.

 and this one:

[after Clouseau accidentally reduces a piano to a pile of splinters]

Mrs. Leverlilly: You've ruined that piano!

Clouseau: What is the price of one piano compared to the terrible crime that's been committed here?

Mrs. Leverlilly: But that's a priceless Steinway!

Clouseau: Not anymore

Those were from the best of the Pink Panther series (IMHO), The Pink Panther Strikes Again.

The slapstick scenes and the ones between Clouseau and Kato crack me up no matter how many times I watch them. I only wish Bert Kwok had been in more movies. He made an appearance in Jet Li’s Kiss of the Dragon, but in a serious role. I haven’t seen him in any others.

Anyways, I’ve enjoyed almost every Blake Edwards movie I’ve seen. My favorite, hands down outside of the Pink Panther series is an obscure film almost no one has seen but is in my opinion quintessential Blake Edwards. The movie is called Skin Deep and it features John Ritter in what I consider to be his best comedic role; a womanizing, alcoholic writer who is ultimately redeemed. The scene where John Ritter’s character (Jack) is trying to get to his car after being electrically tortured by an ex-girlfriend is a hilarious example of physical comedy at its best and John Ritter was a master at this.

What made Edwards’ movies stand out was the witty, almost always hilarious dialogue, his  knack for creating complex, funny characters and making completely wacky situations seem almost possible. The storylines were always interesting even if the premise was as simple as surviving the Blind Date from hell!  Even some of the minor characters in his movies were memorable. The waiter in the restaurant scene in Victor/Victoria (Graham Stark) was hilarious. The actor portraying that waiter made appearances in several Edwards’ movies.  

I haven’t seen all of his movies. I’ve never seen the iconic Breakfast at Tiffany’s and I’m pretty sure I won’t see it unless I’m dragged to it. One of these days I’ll watch Days of Wine and Roses, but I’m pretty sure I won’t like it either.

Again, I’m not sure where his politics leaned, but I know he and his wife were both philanthropists and were big on children’s causes, so that makes him okay in my book besides the fact that his movies have provided me with hours of laughter and entertainment. He’s one of the few directors in Hollywood who made movies that my wife and I both enjoyed, and that is indeed an anomaly. That he was married for 41 years also makes him an anomaly in Hollywood, although how hard can it be to be married to Julie Andrews? I’m gonna have to dig out my collection of Pink Panther movies and sit down and enjoy a belly laugh or two. RIP Mr. Edwards and thank you.

And so this is Christmas.

I know, I shamelessly stole that line from that misguided, secular, but optimistic John Lennon song. Not because it’s my favorite or because I even particularly like it all that much.  If you must know, my favorites are The Little Drummer Boy, Mary Did You Know, Do You Hear What I Hear, and for just foot tapping, finger snapping simplicity, Feliz Navidad gets me going. But much like the former Beatle, I’m trying to make a point.

Many things to say about Christmas. For Christians this season is yet another occasion to celebrate the life of our Lord and Savior. Additionally, we use the season to attempt to bring more people to Christ. We don’t need a specific season to do either of those things as we do them all year long, but since this time of year where many do focus just a little on Christ (whether you believe in Him or not) we Christians like to strike while the iron is hot and redouble our efforts to attempt to save those who still need saving (I use the term “we” loosely as I’m a lousy disciple. I’m more concerned with my personal salvation and those close to me than anyone elses). In the process we give more money to support missions, collect food for the poor, perform work for those unable to do it, and comfort for those who need it. Again, we do this all year long as well.  We’re a nice bunch, despite the movies, TV shows and books depicting the lot of us as intolerant, narrow minded, racist (only if you’re white), backward knuckle dragging superstitious, troglodytes and lunatics. There are those most certainly out there, but like all cross sections of society, it takes all kinds and those guys get all the press.

I’m not going to rant against the commercialization of the season as I don’t necessarily think that’s a bad thing. For one thing, being a shameless capitalist I don’t see a single thing wrong with people going out there and spreading their money around more than usual, stimulating the economy and creating more jobs. For whatever reason.  Heck, some businesses NEED the Christmas season to balance out their entire year. Nothing wrong with that and shopping has little to do with Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

I’m also not going to rant against the policy of wishing people a “Happy Holidays” instead of Merry Christmas, because the simple fact of the matter is that the season also includes the Holy celebration of Hanukah, the made up season of Kwanzaa and the ridiculous season of Festivus (Seinfeld fans will get that). I will wish everyone a Merry Christmas, but if I don’t get it in return, I’m just not going to get my knickers in a wad about it. I won’t boycott businesses who won’t say Merry Christmas and I won’t let it diminish my joy with the season.

I won’t even rant against the militant attempts by atheists and agnostics who want to remove all Christian symbols such as nativity scenes from public view and forcing everyone to refer to secular symbols like Christmas trees as “Holiday Trees”. Kind of ironic since the word “Holiday” is derived from the words Holy Day. I think it’s a little ridiculous and hysterical that they assign so much power to something they profess to not believe. I’m sure they wouldn’t attack a big statue of Obi Wan Kenobe with as much vehemence. We all know he doesn’t exist, but he clearly doesn’t evoke the same vitriol as any image that may represent Christ in any way shape or form. Funny thing. I lived in Qatar for almost two years. It is a country governed for the most part by Sharia law, although they are regarded as a moderate Muslim country. During Christmas, images of Christ are prevalent throughout the season. There are displays of Nativity scenes and the words “Merry Christmas” are displayed prominently. I actually caroled in Qatar to a group of Christians, Jews and Muslims and the Muslims enjoyed it just as much (my solo performance of Feliz Navidad was talked about throughout the year, mostly because of volume rather than musical talent). Here’s something from Abu Dhabi this season:

http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=CNG.937a29e74a6fa43f33a85ed42e22fb84.11&show_article=1

I know the tree began as a secular symbol, but they’re still calling it a CHRISTmas tree. I personally know atheists who are celebrating Christmas with those same symbols. And what does Christ have to do with a Christmas tree? The Menorah is a more specific symbol of a Holy day than the Christmas tree. Shouldn’t we be decorating a cross or a giant fish? The Christmas tree has little to do with Jesus Christ of Nazareth.  

Some like to make the point that Christmas has little to do with Christ at all. The gift giving at Christmas was intended to commemorate the gifts brought to Him by the Three Wise Men as an infant, but the gift giving during Hanukah has nothing to do with that, so gift giving is not it. There are other Winter customs of gift giving that are not based on the Three Kings story as well. Gift giving has little to do with Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

December 25^th as the historic date of Christ’s birth does not really exist. In Spanish countries January 6^th is the celebrated date. Not of His birth but of the visit by the Three Kings. Puerto Rican children make out because they get gifts on both days. It’s one of those mysteries that of all the specifics that we know about Jesus’ life, we don’t really know the exact date of His birth. We know his family genealogy all the way to Adam and Eve. We can pinpoint the hundreds of thousand year old prophesies he fulfilled in His life and can verify His historic existence via other documentation besides the Bible. We just don’t know exactly what date He was born. We began our modern day calendar based on His life even though the term “Before Christ” or BC is no longer being used. Before Common Era or BCE is now the popular term.  December 25^th or January 6^th have little to do with Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

The point is, none of that stuff is going to bother me this Christmas and here’s why. Jesus Christ of Nazareth is bigger than all of it. He is bigger than any plastic display of His birth or any pagan symbol added to celebrate His birth. He will not cease to exist because some people stamp their feet and have a meltdown at the mere mention of His name. Much like love, gravity, subatomic particles and other intangibles, He exists despite the inability to see or touch Him. The fact that some don’t believe in Him doesn’t change this one bit.

That people behave a little nicer during the season is a good thing. That they give gifts and get in touch with people they don’t speak with all year is a good thing. That we get to eat all kinds of goodies we may avoid all year is a good thing. That we’re just a little friendlier, kinder, happier, sappier, these are all good things. That intentionally or not, it is because of the birth of the Savior of the world is definitely a good thing.

So I’m gonna listen to Christmas music on the radio (in Spanish and English) whether the music is about His birth, or about a snowman, reindeer or a fat elf in a red and white suit. I’m gonna decorate my Christmas tree which I cut down myself. I’m gonna finally find some time to decorate the outside of my house before my neighbors come at me with torches and pitchforks (ya gotta see my street, it’s like the Griswold Family Christmas out there), I’m gonna make and drink some Coquito, eat Pasteles, Pernil and pie. I’m gonna figure out a way to cook that turkey-zilla a friend of mine slaughtered and gave me (the carcass takes up my entire freezer and it won’t fit in any conventional roasting pan).

Most of all, I’m gonna celebrate the gift of love and eternal life granted to me by the sacrifice of blood by Jesus Christ of Nazareth, the Lamb of God and the Light of the World. I’m gonna celebrate that it is only through His Grace that I am saved as I cannot earn it by acts or good intentions. I’m going to wish His blessings upon my friends, acquaintances and loved ones. I’m going to do this via the very simple words, Merry Christmas.

Oh, and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Fifty Rants

 by Anthony D. Hubble

I was born on the same day that Christopher Columbus discovered Puerto Rico in 1493. For all you funny people out there who can’t resist old guy jokes, my year was 1960. It was also my father’s birthday. He would have been 73. It is my 50^th birthday and in honor of that august occasion of turning a half century old I’ve decided to write out fifty of the things that I’ve concluded with certainty in my fifty years on the blue marble. Some are tongue in cheek, some are serious, others are frivolous. You can decide which is which. They are listed in no particular order, rather as a result of brainstorming. Feel free to disagree if you’d like, but the experiences that led me to these conclusions are mine alone and therefore have been filtered through my own unique brand of lunacy. Don’t jump in that pool unless you can swim well.

1. 1.     You must be bold in the pursuit of your dreams. They are God’s gift to you and only you can let them die.
2. 2.     Presumptuous stupidity is easy to find because it wears a bell around its neck.
3. 3.      I wish I had a Tiger for a pet. I’d call him Zeus and take him out for walksies every day.
4. 4.     Billy Joel is the best singer songwriter of the 20^th century, so I’m quoting him here to keep it clean. “I learned about sex but not enough. Found that the dances still looked tough anyways. Oh yeah.” And that’s all I got to say about that.
5. 5.     I can fail at every endeavor I attempt, but my five children will still be the marker that will measure the sum total of my successes. They are unsurpassable as that marker.
6. 6.     There is one secret to the success of a relationship, and that is that the two parties involved in the relationship have to want that relationship to succeed above all things. Their motivation is irrelevant. Love, passion, honesty, trust, communication, all those things contribute, but so does duty, fear, laziness, resentment and even politeness. The driving desire for it to succeed, on the part of both parties, is the one key ingredient. It will make you do the things necessary for its success.
7. 7.     Telling someone you love them, if you don’t is despicable. Even if you do, it’s not always a good idea. There are clearly situations where it is purely self serving to say those words. Plus, once you let that genie out of the bottle you can’t stuff him back in. 
8. 8.     I married the woman of my dreams. I’m still not sure how she made out in that deal.
9. 9.     Few things are cooler than a bull riding monkey and I have a picture that proves it.
10. 10.The fight you win one hundred percent of the time is the one in which you don’t engage. How you make that decision is contingent upon how much you’re willing to sacrifice or compromise. You should know what that is beforehand. It gives you more control over the decision.
11. 11. Hitting someone with a padded stick is one of the funnest things you can do. It’s almost as cool as a bull riding monkey. Hitting someone with padded hands and feet is a close second.
12. 12. The liberal mindset remains a mystery to me. So does most females. I wonder if there’s a correlation.
13. 13. The naysayers always outnumber the yeasayers. Who you heed is still your choice.
14. 14. Neil Sedaka is right. When you’re the father of boys you worry, when you’re the father of girls you pray. The good news is that prayer works. So does raising them right. Wearing one of your firearms on your hip in the presence of her potential suitors also helps.
15. 15. I’m clearly not as good looking, charming or intelligent as I think. This is a very recent discovery. Also I can’t carry a tune. This I’ve known for quite some time though. It doesn’t change my tendency to burst into song at the drop of a dime. Karaoke anyone?
16. 16. You just cannot regulate human passion. History has shown that people will risk everything they worked for just to have a little strange.
17. 17. It’s ironic how some people who have contempt for and are inherently suspicious of government workers will default to petitioning that government to solve their problems as if the “government” itself is a separate entity and not run by the very people for whom they have contempt.
18. 18. I used to think that anyone who had the means and wherewithal would open their own business. I’ve discovered that this is not true. Most people are perfectly happy working for someone else. I don’t mean this as criticism for one or praise for the other. It just is.
19. 19. I don’t understand people who are afraid of snakes and spiders. How can you fear an animal you can outrun and an insect you can squash with your shoe?
20. 20. I’ve enjoyed some jobs more than I ever thought I would. Some in particular I had no inkling I was going to do. Being a US Navy Chief was one of those. Being a bodyguard was another.
21. 21. Conversely, some jobs I thought I would like left me either uninspired or I completely detested. Being a Tech Writer was the former, caring for livestock was the latter. 
22. 22. I love teaching. The subject matter is irrelevant. I once taught cryptography (yeah, zzzzzz!) and still enjoyed the process of teaching that course. Being a martial arts instructor is the best of all. If I weren’t teaching martial arts I suppose I’d enjoy teaching history or political science.
23. 23. I used to think I had a hundred books in my head I would write. To date I have only completed one. Turns out, to date I have a hundred BEGINNINGS to books in my head. I’m trying to fix that.
24. 24. Protecting Nahir is a masterpiece of contemporary American literature in the Murder Mystery genre.  It’s way more entertaining than One Hundred Years of Solitude. I’m still waiting for my Nobel prize.
25. 25. I loved being a military sailor and the U.S. Navy saved my life. The sense of adventure I used to get from pulling into a foreign and new port is incomparable. Plus we got to blow stuff up. Beats the heck out of pulling crab from the bottom of the Bering Sea although I think I may have enjoyed that too.
26. 26. I have never seen as spectacular a night sky on land as I’ve seen at sea. The same goes for sunsets and sunrises. Everyone should go out to sea at least once to experience these. Majestic is one of those words you can rarely use, but it can be used frequently to describe the days and nights at sea.
27. 27. People who whine about not making enough money annoy me to no end. Particularly when they blame external forces for that paucity. Want more money? Work harder, smarter or longer. One or all of those three are guaranteed to make you more money. It is an undisputable fact.
28. 28. There are three universal truths about food. If you can bread it and deep fry it, wrap bacon around it, or melt cheese on it, almost everything becomes edible. I had a shipmate who would melt cheese on everything he ate. When you asked him why he did that he would shrug and say “cause it tastes better.” Simple as that. Amen Dusty!
29. 29. Breaded Fried chicken is the best food on the planet. Colonel Sanders should be canonized by the Vatican.
30. 30. “I coulda been…” is the most tragic thing a person can say. It’s also very often inaccurate. If you coulda been and are still breathing you can still be. And maybe if you’re not, you just could not have been. Or is that too cryptic? Here’ s an example, I coulda been a Salsa singing star if I had a modicum of musical talent. See what I mean?
31. 31. Victimhood is an opium pipe many people will suck on first before accepting the stark cold truth of personal responsibility. Society today in many ways fills that pipe and holds a match to it, particularly if you’re a person of color or a woman.
32. 32. I’ve accepted the fact that I’m not right 100 percent of the time. I’ve accepted it, but I still don’t agree with it.  I get this trait honestly. Below my father’s picture in his high school yearbook is the caption in quotes, “I’m not arguing with you, I’m telling you!”
33. 33. I consider the ability to laugh at myself a precious gift. One of the few pearls of wisdom I learned from my father is to not take myself too seriously since no one else will either.
34. 34. Faith doesn’t come easily to me. My ability to think critically would lead me to dismiss my strong faith in the existence of God if my faith weren’t so strong. I get it, it’s a dichotomy. I resolve this by simply stating, “There is no God” and then laugh at how ridiculous that sounds. I’ve done lots of research. It is staggering to me that there are people who don’t believe in His existence. I only hope He is merciful enough to forgive them and save them as well. I don’t think He will. In the end however, I can only state with certainty that He exists. What His plans are ultimately will remain a mystery until I face Him. I suspect I’ll be okay with whatever He has planned for me. I have been thus far.
35. 35. Christianity is the best deal on the planet. There are only two pre-requisites to belong to the club and you can’t “earn” your way in. Good thing too because I clearly could not. Even some Christians don’t get this.
36. 36. Casablanca is still the best movie I have ever seen. Humphrey Bogart made a lot of bad movies, but he was good in all of them. The same is true for Jack Nicholson.
37. 37. I watch way too much television. I should be doing other things instead. Even so, I don’t feel guilty about it.
38. 38. I love to swim. It is one of my favorite physical activities. Funny thing is, I don’t have the body of a swimmer. I have short thick limbs. Lucky for me I don’t have a desire to be a competitive swimmer. I just love to swim. The good thing is that when I’m too old and feeble to do anything else I will still be able to play Tai Chi and swim.
39. 39. I find just as much enjoyment out of doing fifty things at once as I find doing nothing at all. I’m very impressed with my ability to do nothing at all.
40. 40. The best place to do nothing at all is on a beach.
41. 41. I don’t believe in psychic phenomena, although I’ve had two experiences that cannot be explained rationally and by definition would be psychic experiences.
42. 42. The hardest dessert for me to do without is ice cream. I could eat my weight in butter pecan ice cream. That I rarely eat ice cream is a testament to my will power. Instead I eat fried chicken. It’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.
43. 43. I’m always surprised to see how fat I look in pictures. I’m not blaming the camera, I just don’t see myself that way in the mirror. I get this from my mother. She has no clue how she looks in the clothes she chooses to wear.
44. 44. I have no fashion sense either. Okay, maybe I do, but it’s not a very good one. This doesn’t improve with age and sophistication either. This discovery came as a surprise to me, but I’ve grown to accept it. Now that I shop for my own clothes this could become a problem as it usually has been when I’ve shopped for my own clothes in the past.
45. 45. Almost nothing beats that first cup of coffee in the morning. I said ALMOST nothing.
46. 46. Life is not fair and no one promised you anything. Too many people nowadays think that leveling the playing field means guaranteeing the outcome of a situation rather than making the opportunities equal.
47. 47. The Declaration of Independence and the U. S. Constitution are the most masterful documents written by man, second only to the Holy Bible. I believe they were both inspired by God. That the framers were fallible men who were able to come together and compose these documents that made us the greatest country on the planet is proof of this.
48. 48. People who live in this country who believe they’re oppressed have no idea what oppression is. In this country people believe they’re being oppressed if they have no cell phones or basic cable. I’ve seen oppression around the world and we don’t hold a candle to it. True oppression is the inability to change the crappy situation you’re in. In many countries this is the status quo. In our country you are truly free to change your situation. The amount of money Larry Flynt, Mike Tyson, Dog Chapman and 50 Cent have made is proof of this. It’s ironic that many people in this country want to emulate the countries where this is just not possible.
49. 49. Going through life without a sense of humor is like sliding down a splintered board bare butt naked. It hurts all the way down. I don’t remember where I read this, but it is right as rain even if the imagery is a little disturbing.
50. 50. I haven’t had a mid-life crisis and I don’t think I will. Mainly because I believe people who have mid-life crisis’ are the ones who live with regret and want to recapture their youth. I have no regrets. I know that’s a bold statement, but here’s the thing, I’ve done most of what I’ve wanted. I haven’t jumped out of an airplane yet (the operative word is yet), but I have cliff dived. I haven’t swam in the Olympics, but I’ve swam in almost every ocean on the planet, and not just from the beach. I’ve been deeply in love and had that love returned. I’m not a rock star, but I sang Billy Joel’s “You May Be Right” in front of hundreds of people in Golcuk, Turkey (and I rocked that house!). I haven’t fought for the PKA World Championship, but I am currently in first place in the state of Arizona, vying to be World Champion in Combat Stick. I haven’t been a boxing or MMA referee, but I get to judge martial arts tournaments several times a year. I’ve never held public office, but I can list as a job accomplishment “assisted President Reagan in expediting the demise of the evil Soviet Empire” (my contribution, albeit much smaller). I’ve published a novel, was a bodyguard for George Benson and Ricky Martin, and have stood in the spot where the Savior of the world was crucified for our sins. Not to mention being partially responsible for the birth of five of the most precious beings on the planet. I’ve lived with the mother of four of those children for almost 30 years. Honestly what is there to regret?

 If you have made it this far in my rant you are one of my new favorite people. So I give you one more, for good luck!

1. 51. Turning 50 is a huge deal! Those who trivialize it as “just another number” need to take another look. Some of the most famous and accomplished people never made it to 50. Bruce Lee died at age 33. Bobby Darin and Edgar Allan Poe died at age 40. My father did make it to age 69 despite abusing his body with alcohol, cigarettes and who knows what else for probably 60 of those years (I watched him once light 15 cigarettes in a row, one off the butt of the other). My mother turns 70 this year and she still thinks she’s 25. I don’t know how long I’ll last. I firmly believe that God will call me home when His plan for me is complete. I do not intend to “go quietly into that good night”, but go I will. Hopefully in another 30 or 40 years. Either way, I’m sure the adventure continues on the other side. So, I will conclude by saying that I am an exceptionally lucky man. On the occasion of my 50^th birthday on November 19^th, 2010  I will have family members and scores of good friends who will wish me a Happy Birthday. Many of them will mean it. I may even get a present and a card or two. Having been in a place in my life when my birthday went pretty much unnoticed I prefer the former. Some people don’t want a big deal made about their birthdays, particularly, the advanced ones. I’m not one of those people. I’d like to stand on some summit at the top of the world and yell in my best Stallone voice,

“Yo, 50! I did it!”

Here it is, the Mack-Daddy of stupid celebrity quotes. Stated by none other than Elton John. Do I really have to explain how stupid this one is?

"I think Jesus was a compassionate, super-intelligent gay man who understood human problems," John told the Sunday supplement. "On the cross, he forgave the people who crucified him. Jesus wanted us to be loving and forgiving. I don't know what makes people so cruel. Try being a gay woman in the Middle East -- you're as good as dead."

http://entertainment.blogs.foxnews.com/2010/02/18/elton-john-says-jesus-was-a-super-intelligent-gay-man/?test=faces

Historically, academically and theologically this is about the most ignorant thing ever to come out of an entertainer’s mouth. I know, I know, his intention was clearly to be complimentary, but is he really that obtuse that he didn’t think millions of Christians were NOT going to be offended?

He’s right in that Jesus is loving and forgiving and that is also the commandment to Christians so the extent of the retribution he may receive for being an idiot is some verbal protests from some church leaders and possibly a boycott of his music.

However, would he have stated that Mohammed was a pedophile to justify his attraction to young men the reaction would have been violently volatile to say the least even though there’s documented evidence Mohammed was just that.

As usual, it’s okay to be “controversial” and “edgy” when it comes to insulting Christians since Muslims literally like to reciprocate by raining down the wrath of Allah.

Anyone remember the Danish cartoons?

Damn! Here’s another collection of CD’s I’m now gonna have to get rid of!

In case you’re living in a cave or are completely politically unaware (not a bad condition I grant you) Sarah Palin has been hired by the Fox News Network as a political commentator. And why not? As opposed to some of the talking heads I know of, she has actually fought in those trenches. I know I know, it is the popular wisdom that she’s a vacuous dimwit. Right. Like President Bush.

It amuses me when I hear that kind of criticism and judgment from people I actually know who’ve accomplished very little in their own lives. You know the type; the ones sitting in the cheap seats with ALL the answers for everyone else but cant seem to apply them to their own lives.

Anyways, her selection has aroused much teeth gnashing, rending of clothes and cries of hysteria from the liberal left. I found it especially amusing when people like Mika Berzhezinski of CNN try to mock her and wind making an idiot of themselves. On Joe Scarborough’s show she was trying to mock Palin’s answer to Glenn Beck’s question “Which was your favorite founding father?”.

You may not like Palin’s answer either, but I may have answered the same way. I admire Washington, Adams, Jefferson, Franklin, Hancock and Madison for different reasons and I believe that each one individually living at a different time may not have had the impact on history they had collectively. My hands down favorite however, like Palin’s was Washington. In fact he remains my favorite president.

Even if you did not like her answer (and Beck did not) Mika truly made an a$$ of herself when she called out “Me Lincoln, but okay”. Last I checked Ole Abe’s time was almost a century after the founding of the country, “but okay”.

What's astounding to me is how hypocritical the womens movement and feminists are when it comes to Sarah Palin. Bear with me regarding the following dichotomy. Hillary Clinton rode her husband’s coattails all the way to the Senate and the Department of State. Yet she is the feminist movement’s poster woman. She has tolerated the kind of betrayal and public humiliation we preach that strong independent women should NOT have to tolerate from her husband. It was almost a foregone conclusion that she was going to cinch the Democratic nomination for president until the party threw her under the bus in favor of the Golden Child. 

Sarah Palin rose from a tiny obscure Alaskan burg to the Governorship of the largest state in the union (in a male dominated society with an entrenched good ole boys network) to just a couple percentage points from the Vice Presidency. ALL ON HER OWN MERITS! All the while raising a family in what can only be considered the last wild frontier of our country. She epitomizes the image of the frontierswoman. She should be the poster child for the feminist movement that supposedly says women can "have it all". But, because of her beliefs and her pro-life stance, they are the first to castigate her.

That is the hypocrisy of the women's movement. The women’s movement is no longer about equal rights, but, as Ann Coulter has written, about empowering women to have indiscriminate sex with men they do not want to father their children (oops, I went and quoted another lightning rod for the left!)

I’ve said this before about Sarah Palin. I honestly don’t know how intelligent she is. I’ve heard her speak and I’ve concluded she’s as smart as most people I’ve heard speak in public life. That’s to say she’s as prone to a verbal gaffe as the next person who’s under that kind of microscope. It’s not her IQ I admire. More to the point, I’ve met some incredibly intelligent people who are incapable of managing their own lives, much less govern someone else’s. My father was one of the smartest people I’ve known but he died inches from the “gutter” where he spent a great deal of his life.

I admire Sarah Palin for precisely the same reason she’s being demonized by the left. She is an uncompromising conservative and expresses those views without reservation. This is a view that has been neglected by Republicans. The fact is, it has become de rigeur for conservatives to try "reaching out" to the liberals so they can appear accommodating and compromising. From Bush to McCain whenever they reached out to the liberals they got burned. Why? Liberals are not accommodating or compromising. Their agenda is all or nothing. I don’t fault them for that. I just wish we could ship them off somewhere so they can form their own country. France is nice this time of year.

The liberal press enables them by propagating stupid views when a conservative adopts an uncompromising conservative position. If you are against the killing of an innocent child in the womb or against the Supreme Court creating Constitutional rights out of thin air then you're really sexist and against "choice" (like that's what the Supreme Court gave us).

If you're against lifetime entitlements and unconditional government welfare for life you're really "anti-minority". Here's an example, the view that Bush did not like Black people was propagated widely by the press despite the fact that he did more for Africa than any president in history. They shamelessly used the Katrina tragedy (which was a failure of the state government) to hammer this point home.

In the end, to me, character counts. The one thing of which I’m absolutely certain based on all evidence is that Sarah Palin has more character than any politician I’ve studied in recent years. I know I’m a knuckle dragging, gun toting, fanatical religious wingnut, but that’s where my vote goes. Based on my study of this nation’s history I’m clear that the men and women of character have been the ones most responsible for its successes. The opposite may also be true, but the exceptions are too small to sway my opinion.

More to the point, it is the vehemence with which she is attacked that makes me believe we may just have something here. To the left I say keep it up. She is not just another fad. If she were just a "curiosity" we wouldn’t still be hearing about her. She would have been just another also-ran. Like Gary Hart. She has been dismissed, ridiculed and attacked more viciously than anyone I can remember (Hillary Clinton comes close) and her popularity simply continues to grow. Wishful thinking aint gonna make her go away so good luck with that tack.

I forgot who said “I pity the man who does not learn something new every day”. I’m paraphrasing it perhaps and I think it was Abe Lincoln. Either Abe Lincoln or John Kennedy. Dunno. I first read the quote when I was in Junior High and it has stuck with me to this day. I just don’t remember who said it. That one and “Do one thing every day that scares you” are good ones to live by. The older I get however, the less things scare me and the things that still scare me do so for good reason so I don’t think I’ll be doing those purposefully. Point is, life is a perpetual teacher and I’m an avid student of its lessons. Some I learn quickly, some I learn over and over. So to close out this magnificent year (for me) I’d like to list 10 things I’ve learned this year. Before anyone offers some snide comment I’ll say I’ve learned more than 10 things. It’s more like 14. So I’m just listing the 10. In fact, some of them I’ve learned in the past but have been reminded of them this year.

1.  God’s grace is an ever flowing river that continually blesses those who are clearly undeserving. Namely me. I’m thankful for it nonetheless.

2. Stupid and willfully ignorant people no longer annoy me. I’m more entertained by them. I’m sure I still annoy them. That’s just icing on the cake.

3. I am capable of more humility than I ever thought possible. This is probably a good thing since I’m clearly capable of more arrogance than anyone should ever be. One of those balancing the scales things I suppose. My wife will probably vehemently disagree with the first while emphatically agreeing with the second, but what does she know? She’s only the humblest least arrogant person I know.

4. Hip replacement surgery is a (fill in appropriate expletive)!

5. Almost 50 year old bodies do not recover as quickly as 20 year old bodies. What makes the difference however, is the power of your will. My 20 year old mind would give up much quicker than my almost 50 year old mind. Perhaps it’s just more stubborn. I like to think it’s been forged over the years into a magnificently, indomitable force of nature. The hammer I use is the power of positive thinking. It’s possible I simply don’t know any better.

6. I think way too highly of myself.

7. Freshly killed Elk meat makes the best burgers and you can’t find a roasting pan to accommodate a 34 lb turkey. It has to be cut in half. However, a hand fed 34 lb turkey is very tender and very tasty. I think way too much about food, but it is still only my second most powerful motivator.  I know there are three points listed here but, I believe they’re related. Besides, SHUT UP, it’s my list!

8. Few things are cooler than a Panda bear in a kung fu stance and nothing is as cool as a bull riding monkey!

9. I can spend more than 3 days without going online.

10. People believe in something even though they claim to believe in nothing. The belief in atheism is as powerful as the belief in an omnipotent being. They’re both based on faith. Atheism is motivated by arrogance while belief in God is motivated by humility. They both ignore physical evidence which attempts to dispute them. Agnosticism is simply cluelessness and apathy.

So there they are. Some were new lessons, some simply reaffirmed. There are many who can attempt to dispute these, but if you simply put the words “I believe” in front of each one you’ll get the point that they are MY lessons. Few of my life’s lessons are absolutes. For example, I’m not as good looking as I once thought, but I’m better looking than I once was. Try to not let that confuse you and no it’s not subject to debate.

In any case I’m not certain learning some new things necessarily make me wise. Simply wise-er (ya have to know where the scale starts). I will simply continue to experience life its ownself and continue to be amazed by the incredible comedy of it all. I’ll learn a couple things along the way so that when my time on this earth ends and I’m facing the Almighty, I’ll at least have an answer to present when he asks me:

“So what did you see down on Mulberry Street?”

Although I’m sure that won’t be the nature of that conversation.

Happy New Year to all and may God’s grace shower you all with blessings in 2010!

 I wrote about this way back in 2005 when I was in the Middle East. I had several conversations with our troops on R/R from Iraq. One of their favorite subjects was how full of crap the mainstream media’s coverage in Iraq was at the time. Stuff like reporting from the Green Zone while embedded and never going out on patrol with the troops. This issue came up time and again. The troops were very offended as they took great pains to be sensitive to the Iraqi culture and the civilian populace. The took great pains to be careful, as directed by their leadership, to then just see themselves raked over the coals by these idiots in the press whose sole agenda was to lambast the President. Then again, my cousin, who was working for Blackwater at the time, did pride himself on peeing in Saddam Hussein’s pool. Guess we aint all perfect.

Damage to Iraqi Antiquities was Media Hype

American-led coalition forces were blamed for the destruction of Iraqi antiquities following the 2003 invasion, including inflicting serious damage to the ancient site of Babylon.

But reports of extensive damage have turned out to be largely media hype, according to Forbes magazine columnist Melik Kaylan.

Writing in Saturday's Wall Street Journal, Kaylan noted that John Curtis, head of the British Museum's Middle East Department, was "the single most persistent source" of reports on the supposed destruction.

In January 2005, the BBC reported that "coalition forces in Iraq have caused irreparable damage to the ancient city of Babylon," attributing the disclosure to the British Museum.

The BBC said "sandbags have been filled with precious archaeological fragments and 2,600-year-old paving stones have been crushed by tanks."

Curtis went on to say later that a coalition helicopter base had caused cracks in the bas-reliefs on Babylon's original walls.

A story the Boston Globe stated that "Iraq's U.S.-led invaders inflicted serious damage on Babylon, driving heavy machinery over sacred paths, bulldozing hilltops, and digging trenches through one of the world's greatest archaeological sites."

But this year Curtis began to step away from his earlier claims, acknowledging that Saddam Hussein "had already caused grievous harm to the site in various ways" before the invasion, Kaylan observed in The Journal.

And a memoir published in April by Emilio Marrero, who was chaplain of the Marine Expeditionary Force that first secured Babylon from looters in 2003, said the site was already in poor condition and U.S. forces worked to protect and preserve it.

Marrero told Kaylan that the helicopter base was "up to two football fields away" from the area of supposed damage and the cracks in the bas-reliefs were there before the invasion.

He also discounted allegations that tanks had crushed paving stones and archaeological fragments were used to fill sandbags, saying they were in fact filled with earth.

Kaylan disclosed that Curtis made a June 2008 trip to Iraq along with Elizabeth Stone from Stony Brook University in New York, and found "little or no post-Saddam damage" in southern Iraq's eight most important archaeological sites.

"They did not visit Babylon in the north," Kaylan wrote, "but the places they saw covered a full fifth of the entire landmass of Iraq — all relatively undamaged."

The National Museum in Iraq has now been reopened to the public, with most of its greatest treasures back on display, Kaylan adds, because "the museum's most valuable items were locked away in a vault, untouched by looters."

Okay, so it’s taken me a while, but here it is. Like I’ve said, Billy Joel and Ruben Blades are two of my favorite singer/songwriters. I’ve already written of the philosophy of Billy Joel (look back in my notes for that one).

Ruben Blades is a unique individual. He’s the kind of dichotomy to which I can relate. A Harvard educated lawyer, he has made his living for the past 30 some years as a Salsa musician. For those who do not listen to Salsa he has also had a fairly successful acting career. If you go to IMDB you’ll see an extensive and diverse body of film work. Originally from Panama, he even ran for the country’s presidency a few years back. He has been a groundbreaking songwriter in the latin music genre and his CD Mundo is a masterful fusion of world music into the Salsa genre. He also has one of those distinct voices that is unmistakable. You hear it once and you’ll recognize it if you hear it again.

The problem I’ve encountered in writing this is that some of my favorite lyrics of his simply do not translate well. For example I love “Buscando Guayabas”. The pure simplicity of the lyrics and the snappy melody just make it a fun song (particularly Ruben’s vocalization of a guitar solo). When I attempt to translate Una guayaba salve morena, una guayaba que este bien buena!  I get the funny looks my wife always gives me when I try to translate some Latin colloquialisms.

Another problem is that many of his songs are complete stories and it’s difficult to simply translate just the one lyric without its context within the song.

In any case, here is my small sample of the world according to Ruben Blades.

Si naciste pa’ martillo del cielo te caen los clavos.- Pedro Navaja (If you were born to be a hammer nails will fall from heaven).

God has a plan for you. You may not like it but in the end you must follow it. For those who don’t believe in God the same thing applies to fate and karma.

Cuanto control y cuanto amor, tiene que haber en una casa. Mucho control y mucho amor para enfrentar a la desgracia.- Control y amor.  (How much control, and how much love, must there be in a household. A lot of control and a lot of love to face tragedy).

Despite what family does, they are family and you must support them, failing that, you must love them. Family is family.

 Sin tu carino son de carton todas las estrellas, y no hay poesia ni hay alegria cuando no estas.- Sin tu carino. (Without your love the stars are made of cardboard, and there is no poetry nor joy when you are not here).

The entire song speaks of the emptiness of the world without the love of the object of your own affection. Who has not been there?

Como el carino que guardias despues de muerto a abuela. Patria son tantas cosas bellas.- Patria. (Like the love you still cherish, even after death, for your grandmother. Country means so many beautiful things).

In this song, Ruben attempts to define the intangible concept of patriotism by comparing it to commonly felt emotions.

 Mientras no haya justicia, jamas tendremos paz. -Buscando America.  (While there is no justice, we’ll never have peace).

Injustice is the root of unrest.

Decisiones, cada dia, alguien pierde alguien gana, Ave Maria. -Decisiones. (Decisions, every day, some lose, some win, Hail Mary).

Decisions made carry inescapable consequences, good or bad, for all. “Ave Maria” is a generic Latin expression like “my goodness”.

Toma su sueos raidos, los parcha con esperanzas. Hace del hambre una almohada, y se acuesta triste del alma. – Pablo Pueblo. (He takes his frayed dreams, whets them with hope. He makes a pillow of his hunger and goes to sleep sad to his soul.

As with many of Ruben’s songs, this one speaks of the despair of poverty.

Again, these are my interpretations. Admittedly some of the extrapolations were snippets from songs that may as a whole have a completely different meaning. For example, Pedro Navaja is Ruben’s interpretation of the old classic Mack the Knife. Both are favorites of mine. In any case, I hope you’ve enjoyed it.

The one thing about Ruben’s music that is different from Billy Joels is that ate least if you don’t understand what he’s singing you can damn sure dance to it! And after all, dancing is a universal language.

Can’t Salsa? Sucks to be you!

Dr. Thomas Sowell is one of my favorite columnists, for several reasons, but mostly because he sees an orange, he calls it an orange. You can look at an orange and nuance your way around describing it, but in the end isn’t it simple enough to just call it an orange? Why? Because an orange is an orange. The precedent has already been set, and it’s a fairly mundane and universally known object. Failing any evidence to the contrary emerging it will remain an orange. Unless you had to describe it to an extra-terrestrial in which case it would also be simple. Hand it to them and say “orange”. Although it’s ridiculous to think this would be the topic of discussion should you come face to face with an ET.

There’s my orange theory in a nutshell. Later I’ll bore you to tears with the “Hubble bubble” theory.

My point? I don’t like people pissing on my shoes and telling me it’s rain.

Back to Dr. Sowell. Dr. Sowell is an economist. I like to read what economists have to say because math, economics and all things fiscal are not my forte. The problem with reading economists is that they are economists and express themselves as such. They are often pedantic and undecipherable to the lay person with little math skills such as myself. The reason Dr. Sowell is my go-to guy is because he’ll look at an orange and call it an orange. I read his column faithfully and can’t wait to start his new book. He’s not the only one I read, just my favorite. Here’s his latest sample (actually, his random thoughts columns remain my favorites):

http://townhall.com/columnists/ThomasSowell/2009/10/13/magic_numbers_in_politics

http://townhall.com/columnists/ThomasSowell/2009/10/14/magic_numbers_in_politics_part_ii

They have led me to this huge rant with which I’m about to punish anyone bored enough to read it.

I’ve heard the myriad of talking heads, people I know and people on television want to explain away the reason our economy (and the world’s economy) blew up. Most of them like to point to that evil genius (who also happens to be an idiot, according to them) President George W. Bush and the republicans. Then there are those who point to those bleeding heart liberal democrats and their social policies. None of them get a pass in my book, by the way. However, at some point, the problem had a Genesis.

Not being an economist, I got to reading and following the money trail. Discussing government regulatory policies and free markets can get a little complex and oversimplifying it with descriptions of oranges may well be irrelevant. But human nature is much easier to explain. Human nature is my forte.

Human nature is governed for the most part by self-interest and ego. Whether you’re a politician or a businessman you really can’t get away from this. It’s probably splitting hairs stating which one is governed more by self-interest and ego, the politician or the businessman. The difference between a businessman and a politician is that a businessman’s self-interest and ego will usually serve humankind by proxy in a positive manner, regardless of the altruistic nature of the businessman. In a competitive market he will have to serve the consumer and compete with others who may make the product cheaper, better etc.

It’s why professional badminton players do not get millions of dollars to play. To some, badminton may be a better sport than football. To most it is not. Clearly it’s safer. If it attracted more spectators it would in turn attract more players, more teams, more badminton stadiums, etc. Tom Brady may then have been the greatest badminton player that ever lived instead of one of the greatest football players.

It’s also why I can communicate via this media. Bill Gates ego and self-interest has served me the consumer, Microsoft’s employees and its stockholders. It has fed a myriad of other industries by proxy. It has created millions of jobs directly or indirectly. He has to continue to serve me because the very second someone else does it better, Bill Gates loses. The consumer does not, nor do stockholders or employees. They may initially, but in the long run they can also find other options in a competitive market.

A lot of people bandy about the term “greedy corporations” (as in “greedy automaker CEO’s”, “greedy oil company barons” and the most recent “greedy insurance companies”). Politicians attempting to legislate love throwing those terms around. But what the hell is that exactly? Corporations, as such, are neither greedy nor altruistic. They are intangible legal arrangements created by people for the purpose of conducting commerce.

So are people greedy? You betcha. That in itself doesn’t mean that owners of corporations, big or small, are greedy. Funny how people like to point their fingers at CEO’s of major corporations as evil and greedy, but have no problem with an NFL quarterback demanding hundreds of millions of dollars to play a game. Which one of those two create jobs and wealth? Regardless of motive, the CEO’s, entrepreneurs and small businessmen create jobs and wealth. That is also an indisputable fact. Oh and guess who else are the owners of “greedy corporations”. That’s right, every single person who owns stock or contribute to a retirement plan.

The same cannot be said of the politician. Politicians do not create private industry jobs. They create government jobs which have never stimulated the economy or created wealth. They take money from the pockets of hard workers to give to others who may not be as industrious or talented. They make it sound like they have altruistic motives for this, but for the most part their motives are driven by the same machine as the businessman. Self-interest and ego. However, the self-interest and ego of a politician serve only the politician. The problem is the politicians actions normally will leave me with little or no alternate choices and when the politician has legislative pens and an enforcing arm on his side, they can wreak havoc on the rest of us.

That is the Genesis of the problem. If you haven’t been following where I’ve been leading you, I’ll spell it out for you. Politicians are the root of our problem.

Few disagree with the fact that the housing market was the catalyst that blew up our financial system. What is in dispute is who wore the black hat. Politicians (mostly the Democrats) are pointing their fingers at that evil Wall Street and those evil Bankers! Evil greedy bastards! They say they were not “regulated” enough or watched carefully enough. That their “greedy” tendencies are the root of all evil. That there are a few Gordon Geko’s on Wall street is clearly indisputable, but while they’re making money for your 401k you don’t notice them nor will you render a judgment one way or the other. Your own outrage is allayed by your“greedy” tendencies when you're making.

Other politicians (mostly the Republicans) are pointing their fingers at Democrats and blaming their social engineering policies and pandering to “the poor” by giving out entitlements for the root of this problem.

They’re both right. And wrong.

As there’s a paucity of space, here are three things for you to read and research: The Community Reinvestment Act, the Depository Institutions Deregulation and Monetary Control Act (1980), the Depository Institutions Act (1982), and the Glass-Steagall Act (and its repeal in 1999). What do these things have in common? You guessed it. They were implemented and/or repealed by whom? Politicians. Both Democrats and Republicans. All of these have led at one time or another to often catastrophic consequences. The CRA and GSA repeal are some of the factors that have led to where we are today. That people took advantage of the politician’s actions and played the system should come as no surprise to anyone. Human nature. Self-interest.

Go out in the middle of a crowded city sidewalk, take a wad of money, throw it in the air and see who among the people walking don’t make a grab for a stray dollar or two. Human nature. Self interest. No consequences there. No sacrifice either. That’s the government, except they don’t take their own money to throw out there. They take my money.

What is never talked about in the saga of Robin Hood (and all other similar stories) is what the people he robbed did to obtain their goods and riches. They may have worked very hard, contributed to charity and earned every precious shiny stone. But in the minds of the stories authors, they are painted with a wide brush as greedy, evil and deserving of being robbed. The poor (to include Robin Hood) are noble, industrious and deserving of receiving the robbed goods. Who makes that call? Robin Hood? What qualifies him? And at what point does he then become “the evil greedy corporation”?

I bet you were thinking that I was going to lead to the whole “it’s Carter’s fault, it’s Clinton’s fault, it’s HW’s fault, it’s W’s fault, it’s Pelosi’s fault, it’s Reid’s fault, it’s Gingrich’s fault!” Well you are wrong. It’s our fault for allowing them to get that powerful.

I’ve been reading of late how this magnificent country got its start on very shaky legs. It was the intention of the vast majority of the founders that the gubmint, particularly the central federal government, never be allowed to become as powerful as it has become. Precisely because of all the reasons I’ve explained. In our entire history, what has emerged as a crystal clear fact, is that we were at our most prosperous and peaceful when the government was reigned in and had very little power over us as individuals and states. Once we began turning to the government for our safety, prosperity and guarantor’s of outcome, not opportunity, we have screwed the pooch to the point where it gave birth to whole litters of inefficient, stifling, controlling and corrupt little puppies. What’s worse is, the dogs are also running the kennel and the offspring of those particular puppies will not get any better.

Isn’t it about time to delegitimize the Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (ACORN)? They are continuously caught with their pants down and their hands in the cookie jar and the Left is continuously rushing to their defense.

This is how far into looney liberalville we’ve travelled. The defense they keep mounting in the face of clear criminal fraud is that these are “right wing hit jobs”. How is that a valid defense? If there were no fraudulent acts being committed there would be no “hit job”, as it were.

James O’keefe, a young documentarian has taken a page from ACORN’s and the Left’s own playbook and conducted a “sting” operation in a Baltimore ACORN office. Essentially he and a young lady posed as a prostitute and her boyfriend trying to buy a house so that she could continue to conduct her prostitution business. They were completely transparent about the young lady’s profession and their intentions with regards to the use of the house. They even suggested that they would be bringing in some under aged Salvadoran girls to employ as prostitutes in the house.

 Not only were they encouraged by the ACORN office, they were given advice on how to buy the house, hide the income and defraud the IRS. They received advice on how to sign the under-aged girls on as dependents (even though the girl posing as the prostitute stated she was only 19). In a word, the actions conducted by the ACORN office employees are despicable and criminal. Read the transcript of the conversation here.

http://biggovernment.breitbart.com/

This is not an isolated incident and these are not “rogue” ACORN employees. This appears to be the M.O. of this organization. Let me remind you, this is the organization that committed voter registration fraud throughout the country in an attempt to get Obama elected. This is the organization that used race baiting to get banks to extend loans to people who could not pay for them. This organization is supported by your tax dollars and they’ve recently been recruited to conduct the all important Census next year. This is the organization that is firmly entrenched in President Obama’s pocket. Talk about letting the wolf loose in the hen house!

It would be nice if our “watchdog media” were conducting these types of sting operations on what is clearly a criminal organization. Fat chance as it would taint their “anointed one”. 

Hopenchange, the other white meat.

Well hell, it’s the same defense that can be used by a dope dealer that arresting them in the act of peddling dope is a “police officer hit job”. If there were no crimes being committed

This collection of letters addressed to the Feminists in Academia is an extraordinarily bold endeavor by Dr. Adams who must feel like a canary in a room full of cats. The only problem is, unbeknownst to the cats, this canary has fangs! Dr. Adams mocks the hypocrisy of the feminist movement in our institutions of higher learning with his unique blend of humor and razor sharp wit. In what must be extremely acerbic confrontations in what can only be described as (ironically) a hostile environment for him, Dr. Adams pulls back the curtain to reveal the man (or woman in this case) pulling the levers and pushing the buttons. He entertains, educates and gets a little comeuppance in the process. A superbly entertaining read!

Clearly I have to amend my original blog regarding the Crowley/Gates arrest incident. I had written that if anyone should be accused of racial profiling it should have been the 911 caller. Turns out, she did not cite race when she called.

http://www.boston.com/news/local/massachusetts/articles/2009/07/27/gates_caller_didnt_cite_race_police_say/

Here’s my caveat however. Had she cited race I wouldn’t have considered her a racist for making the call. It was the actions of the men that prompted her to call and not their race.
I keep reading and hearing about people trying to find “teachable moment” in this case. I can’t believe no one has figured it! The closest pundit I’ve heard come up with it was Juan Williams on Fox News Sunday. Ironically I rarely agree with Juan Williams.

 Let me summarize the “teachable moment for you.  

Mrs. Whalen was aware that there had been break-ins in the area, she sees two men trying to force their way through a front door. She calls police. Sgt Crowley responds to the call, goes to the house, sees Dr. Gates in the house and asks him to identify himself.

Okay, here it comes; the “teachable moment. Ready?

Dr. Gates, a highly educated Harvard professor responds to this request by becoming belligerent and saying, “Why? Because I’m a black man in America?” He follows this up by insulting Sgt Crowley’s mother, in the presence of another black officer and a Hispanic officer.

It’s a scene right out of an Eddie Murphy parody on SNL. So did you get the “teachable moment”? I know, everyone seems to keep missing the point. Why? Because Dr. Gates is indeed a “black man in America”. He gets the instant victims pass. He gets a double pass because he is a personal friend of the President.

If he had been a member of any other ethnic group he would have gotten no sympathy from anyone and his actions would have immediately been questioned. People would have been rightfully stating that becoming belligerent with a police officer investigating a crime is stupid. They would be making fun of a highly educated moron who displayed a huge lapse in common sense and judgment. He would have been mocked for the inordinately large chip on his shoulder. Rightfully so. 

Instead, no one can seem to figure out the “teachable moment”. It’s the huge elephant in the room no one wants to seem to acknowledge.

If you look at my pictures and pictures of every Arab terrorist who hijacked a plane you'll see more similarities than differences. You don’t have to tell me. When I was in Qatar I saw the similarities. It was like I was among my relatives. As a result, I've been "profiled", as it were, on multiple occasions.

Want to know what the difference is between my reaction and Dr. Gates? I'm not as educated as he is, but I am easily credentialed, I'm respectful to the official questioning me and I dont have a huge chip on my shoulder.

Here's the thing, since I do happen to look like every terrorist who ever hijacked a plane, AND since I also have to fly in those airplanes, I would rather they take a second look at me than at an 85 year old white grandmother. I dont call it "profiling". I call it good security based on tangible, historical evidence. Plus, I notice that the officials questioning me provide me with the same measure of respect as I provide them. Thet have been, without exception, professional exchanges.

So you say, I'm not black. That is the point isn't it. With the culture of victimhood being propagated by the black leadership (Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson and now President Obama) a black person will always be a victim. Victimhood is an opiate. The more you get the more you need. That’s the big elephant in the room. The one person who had the power to prevent this entire fiasco was the one who created it to begin with.

Ironically, he was the most educated as well. Ain’t that something?

There are multiple theories being bandied about on the entire Obama/Crowley/Gates situation, but the one thing that keeps coming back to me is this. Regardless of who you think is right, who misspoke, whose motives are in question, what is clear to me is that this is yet another example of President Obama acting in a way that is completely un-Presidential. There really is no way to rationalize the verbiage of his statement. Every reasonable human being in this country, about whom he may have said the same thing would have taken offense. Period. I don’t need concurrence. I’m a student of human nature and those comments were at best un-Presidential and at worst, insulting. In fact, Sgt Crowley has been the most level headed person in this whole situation!

It seems like every time the President goes up against the average American he winds up faring poorly. Even his “surprise” at the “controversy” his “straight-forward” comments has caused underscores his attitude toward the common man. More to the point, why does the President of the United States feel he has to pick a fight with individual citizens who mostly are doing their jobs or exercising their right to free speech? From Joe the Plumber, to Rush Limbaugh and now to Sgt Crowley, he constantly winds up bloviating from his bully pulpit. Then he goes around scolding us for taking umbrage at being insulted! Talk about hubris.

I’ll say another thing, Robert Gibbs is fabulous! I hope Obama keeps him for his entire term. He’s almost as fun as the Vice President. Neither one of them can avoid stupid.

http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0709/25381.html

Note how he trivialized the FOP by dismissively stating they “endorsed McCain”. Right. Do I have to spell out what that means? Since there may be some Obama voters reading this I suppose I do. It means, that if your organization did not endorse Obama or endorsed the other candidate, your positions are no longer relevant in this country while Obama is president. At least as far as the Press Secretary is concerned.

What is telling to me is the quality of a man’s character when the heat is on. President Bush endured 7 years of some of the most foul, direct public attacks ever heaped on a sitting U.S. President. Not once did he direct a personal attack in response; regardless of the content. He bore them all with grace and humor, often self-deprecating in his response. His Press Secretaries were (with the possible exception of that mealy mouthed weasel whose name escapes me right now) equally as classy. Can you imagine Tony Snow or Dana Perino dismissing a statement by NOW or the NAACP at a press conference because they “endorsed Gore or Kerry”?

We can discuss the merits (or lack thereof) of the Gates arrest all day long. What I’m addressing here is not even the arrest. This is what it comes down to. President Obama has stated, without reviewing the facts, and clearly using his own prejudice regarding his friend and his race, that an officer of the law in the performance of his duty acted “stupidly”. This is Barrack Obama at his least presidential. Health Care anyone?

I don’t know if anyone remembers a couple weeks back in Philly, a day camp of black children were turned away from a private swim club because they were black. Allegedly. See when I hear about things like this, particularly when it’s a “he said/she said” situation I usually reserve judgment until the facts are in. The facts are, the black Day Camp paid for the use of the private clubs facilities. They went once and the following day their money was refunded and they were told not to come back. The facts are that the president of the Valley Swim Club (Dr. John Deusler) stated, "There was concern that a lot of kids would change the complexion … and the atmosphere of the club."

I know when I swim my laps I’m usually concerned that some of that wonderful cinnamon color I’m blessed with will leak into the pool. After all, there is chlorine in there! So now some other facts have come to light (again, not because of that crackerjack MSM reporting either). It appears that the good Dr. Duesler is an Obama supporter. Why am I not surprised?

http://sweetness-light.com/archive/pool-kids-booter-is-obama-supporter"

I’m not saying that Democrats are inherently racist (you be the judge). What I’m saying is that they are the masters and all must serve the master! Those who have stepped off the plantation have paid dearly for their arrogance! People like Clarence Thomas and Dr. Condoleeza Rice are prime examples.

How dare Justice Thomas preach a message of personal responsibility, independent thinking and conservative values? How dare he mention a Creator! What an uppity black! Or as Bill Cosby calls him, “brother lite”.  And who the hell does that Condie Rice chick think she is??? Not only is she black, but she’s a woman! What the hell is wrong with her?

I think it just chafes the feminists raw to see a conservative woman rise to those heights without pulling the sexist/racist victim card. This is not just hypothetical. Witness the vitriol launched at these women from the liberals and the feminists. Which confuses me because aren’t women like Dr. Rice, Sarah Palin and Phyllis Schlaffly the epitome to which women are supposed to aspire? Funny how that works.

I watched the Justice Thomas/Anita Hill circus back when he was confirmed and I’ve watched Dr. Rice endure questioning by the Democratic Congress and Senate and I’ve rarely seen the nastiness elevate itself to the level the Democrats shamelessly show these two outstanding public servants. In fact, I forget who it was (but I clearly know he’s a Democrat), but someone had the audacity to say the Justice Thomas’ opinions were poorly written and not all that “smart”. Of course he hadn’t read any. Funny how that works too.

It’s not just blacks either. My fellow “hispanics” vote overwhelmingly Democrat too, although I am proud to say that the current governor of Puerto Rico is a Republican. The first since Luis A. Ferre way back in the 70’s. The treatment that Alberto Gonzalez got from the Democrats should have been enough for some hispanics to wake up and say HEY!

Probably none of them know who Miguel Estrada is, but he should have been the first Hispanic to serve on the SCOTUS. And no, not because he was Hispanic but because he was a brilliant jurist. But we’re sure proud of that J-Lo chick and that Ricky Martin dude!

What’s the difference between Miguel Estrada, Alberto Gonzalez and Sonia Sotomayor? You guessed it. Estrada and Gonzalez are conservatives. The fawning of the Democrats over Sotomayor has been sickening!

And so we vote for the party that tells us they have to take care of us because it’s clear we cannot make it on our own merits and talents. We vote for politicians who want to treat us as their idiot children. And ultimately, we vote for the party that will ensure our subservience to their ideology (I use the term “we” lightly as I’ve never voted for any of them).

The grand ole Democratic Party. Because they’re doing so well now that they’re in control aren’t they?